The kind of night you only get once in a lifetime, the kind of night that calls for SEQUINS in all capitals, and then TEQUILA suckled out of the bellybutton of a stranger.
She was nervous, but she hid it well, beneath her chainmail. The armor was a metaphor; and her bust line, like a tin foil seatbelt, a simile.
Her posture could have silenced a flock of lambs. The sheepskin lining of her cryogenic chamber actually did.
The Coming Out Dress (No. 3588).
Women's sizes 2 through 18.
The nude woman looked up at him with wet eyes. How had she come to this out-of-the-way diner, the waiter wondered... and how, for that matter, had she managed to eat a lobster tail?
"I don't seem to have a choice," she said, eyeing the ketchup packets.
The waiter sighed. He would help her, he decided. After all, she had promised to introduce him to Ryan Seacrest.
The Path of Lace Resistance Dress (No. 4209).
Women's sizes XXS through XS.
It would have to be wallpaper. But what kind? And how would she know if it was right?
You couldn't really audition wallpaper.
Or could you?
The Inexplicable Bush Dress (No. 2375).
Women's one size fits all, paste not included, sold by the sheet.
"I don't know," he laughed. "Either that or your nightgown's two sizes too big!"
Tinkerbell flitted angrily about the room.
"Don't mind her," Peter sighed. "She's just jealous."
"I know," Wendy said. "I know."
The Dust Ruffle Dress (No. 4342).
Women's sizes 0 to 12.
Color: Stankface Photobomb (hahahaha, look behind you, Jessica!)