Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Scenes From a Marriage: Baby > Blog? UPDATED WITH BREAKING NEWS THAT I AM NOW SUPER FAMOUS

Jeff: How's your work* going?
Me: Oh. I'm done. I'm just reading through old blog posts, remembering wistfully when I used to have creative energy. I used to bring it every day.
Jeff: Girl, you still bring it.
Me: False. But... I guess some day I'll look back on this time and feel good about the fact that I gave all of my energy to raising our son, instead of to crafting witty blog posts.
Jeff: Eh, that depends. If he's a success, then yes. If he still lives at home when he's 45, you'll probably regret not making more graphs about your vag.

*This is code for "watching The Voice on Hulu at a very low volume while filling a Baby Gap online shopping cart with tiny fedoras and Guayabera onesies.

*****I INTERRUPT THIS BOTTLE OF WINE ADORABLE MARITAL MOMENT TO BRING YOU FUCKING EXCITING NEWS******
I just ate two boxes of frozen Samoas and my entire colon is now a macaroon. Which is true. But also...
It's just been announced that I will be part of the cast of the very first Listen To Your Mother show in New York City on May 6! This means that someone is letting me read my writing "out loud" in front of an "audience" even with my hair "the way it normally looks." 

This is what I look like when I perform in public. Note Jeff's avoidance at looking at my awesome chicken dance lest all other women be ruined for him.
 I'll let you know when tickets go on sale.
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9 comments :

  1. Congratulations! It will be a fun, energetic show. I look forward to checking you out on stage.

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  2. WOOP! You are going to be fantastic! So happy for you, Una!

    p.s. I love Samoas. I could outeat you. Wait, that sounds dirty.

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  3. I swear to god you're the funniest person on the planet. Congratulations!!

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  4. Hey, congrats. And BTW, while I have never liked reality shows, I am loving The Voice.

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  5. You're going to be great. (Even though I have no idea what this whole LTYM thing is all about because I live in France and all. And even though I adore Ann who started it.

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  6. Congrats! You and your hair will do great. :)

    Also, watching The Voice in a drunken Samoa haze is my favorite "pretending-to-do-work" pastime too!

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  7. Yay, Una! I wish I still lived there so I could come see you. One piece of advice: live readings always go better if you do the chicken dance WHILE you're reading. Bam. You're welcome.

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