Sorry, guys, I have to do another shit-I-did-when-I-wasn't-here roundup today. But Sister Zoe has a guest blog coming tomorrow, so get excited! It is hilarious. So hilarious, in fact, that I almost don't want to post it because it will show me up. Especially when it follows this. But fuck it, I have prizes for you guys.
I have amped up my Pimping Myself Out to Pay for 2029 Tuition (Or, Who Am I Kidding, Maternity Jeggings) Tour, in which I review things for money. Only instead of having sex with anyone I get free shipments of yogurt and stuff, and also the hourly rate's not nearly as good.
But seriously, thanks to BlogHer and their partners I do have some great giveaways this week over on my review blog, The Punky Reviewster. One is the aforementioned Alpina yogurt tasting, which gives you a chance to win a $200 Visa gift card, and the other is the second installment of my HomeGoods shopping adventure, which offers a $100 HomeGoods gift card. All you have to do to enter is comment, and it would make me so happy if one of you guys won, for real. I never give you anything. I need to have a week when I do an Oprah's Favorite Things. Except instead of cars, you'll get 99-cent bags of Tootsie Rolls and scented garbage bags. I can't see you right now, but I'm going to assume you're screaming with joy and clawing at your faces.
ALSO: I have another post up at Aiming Low. It is not about vaginas, but it is about babies, which come out of vaginas, so by the transitive property I am still obsessed with cooters.
I don't usually use the word "cooter" but it's past midnight and this level of tiredness is as close as I get to feeling drunk these days. It's getting crazy up in here! But you already knew that, when I mentioned scented garbage bags.