2. Knowledge that there were additional wigs that didn't qualify for the aforementioned permanent wig storage box, due to their irreparable misshapenness, or suspect stains.
3. The discovery of a sheaf of crude drawings stapled together, labeled "FOOD BOOK" in a childish scrawl, and the subsequent inner debate as to when, exactly, I had made this: age 4, or during a Hulu commercial, waiting for the Mr. Wonton delivery man?
4. Sore right butt cheek (mysterious)
5. Realization that Entertainment Weekly's Greatest Hits: 1991--unearthed inside a mint condition Jansport backpack--does not include "Finally" by CeCe Peniston.
6. Realization that CeCe Peniston, despite the promise of her spectacular name, never really did anything else.
7. The cessation of gingerly placing wigs into FreshDirect boxes in order to watch this:
Peniston: 1; Nursery: Zip.