Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Domo Arigato NaNoWriMo

November is National Novel Writing Month, for some reason.

(I'm thinking the reason is that the inventor of National Novel Writing Month was unemployed and had just been gifted a typewriter and a wheelbarrow full of amphetamines.)

The shorthand used on Twitter is NaNoWriMo. It sounds like a new hybrid neighborhood with airport bathroom-sized studio apartments that rent for ten times my annual salary.

Having fired off my final Project Runway recap just as November began, I had grand plans to celebrate my newfound freedom by banging out a novel in 30 days.

Who cares that I have a stressful full-time job and that I've never successfully written fiction, unless you count When Cathy Learned Sign Language?

Who cares that my wheelbarrow of amphetamines has been peculiarly replaced with a refrigerator filled with eight different kinds of mustard but no chocolate, no matter how many times I open and close the door?

Who cares that I have a blog to feed, and a husband to pester, and abdominal exercises to think about doing?

(These questions are meant to disorient you so that you pay no attention to the fact that I haven't really started my novel yet.)

(I have a sentence.)

(The "iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii" is an accident but I'm totally putting it towards my final word count.)

Maybe November can be National NO Writing Month, and December can be when I get shit done.

(Bonus: The acronym stays the same.)

*Okay, I just Googled it, and apparently "domo arigato" means "thank you very much" in Japanese. Therefore I'd like to stress that the title of this post is sarcastic.  


  1. obviously, i love this. obviously, unemployment is working for me. obviously, i'm also counting chapter headings in my final word count.

    and now, domo arigato mr. roboto will be stuck in my head all day.

    so, domo arigato.

  2. Hahaha! I had the same idea! I figured "heck yes, i'll be able to bang out this ish in a month!"...it's Nov 9 and the farthest I've gotten is a post it note left on my computer desktop that says: Start NaNoWriMo.
    wonder when that'll happen...

  3. I'm so glad you're making some real headway on your 30-day novel project. ;-)

    I have just a teensy bit more on my count. And when I say teensy, I mean about 300 words. Woot woot!

  4. I am attempting NaNoWriMo, as well. I made it to 4005 words. Not sure if I will be making it much farther than that =X

  5. Didn't even attempt it this year, seems like it'd be too much of a rush and i'd just end up with a pile of, umm arigato.

  6. Who finishes a novel in a month?

    Perhaps I'll attempt it, since I'm also attempting to quit Facebook, and one lends itself to the other.

    Also, don't sell yourself short: you have a sentence and 1/4, not just one sentence. Think positive!


  7. You had to google domo arigato? I'm disappointed in your 80's song knowledge for once. You need another listen to Mr. Roboto!

  8. HA! I came across NaNoWriMo at the Texas Writer's League and was like, "WTF?" Even if I wanted to attempt this challenge, I'd probably write about ten pages and then get pissy at myself. F you, NaNoWriMo. F you.

  9. Snoopy's "It was a Dark and Stormy Night," at only 214 words, totally counts as a novel. You're nearly there.

  10. The only sort of novel anyone could write in 30 days would likely be one entirely composed using fake words like "NaNoWriMo." Ew.

  11. This is funny.

    You know, once I wrote 10 chapters of a novel and put both my husband and myself to sleep by it's soul-less (lack of) plot. So more words is not necessarily better.

  12. Anonymous1:42 PM

    I'd hate to be on the panel that chooses the winner. 20,000 30-day novels. How painful would that be? Or is there a winner? Maybe it's just a conspiracy to keep people busy for a month while some nefarious organization executes their plan for world domination. I wonder if I could turn that into a novel. I'm sure it would be almost as exciting as The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, but hopefully a lot less gross. Anyway. Good luck with your veuve and your list and your iiiiiiiii

  13. Haha! I like you Chicken!
    It is a conspiracy I'm sure, but nothing brings people together than feverishly trying to write something worth something in just 30 days, then getting together to complain about how it's not really working.
    I love it!

    Your sentence has potential. You could turn it into an entire paragraph by the end of the week!

  14. This post makes me feel a million times better about my NaNovel, which I've restarted, and which currently weighs in just under a page.

    Thank you for reminding me that I'm not alone. :)

  15. Come join the rest of us rebels doing Memoirs (that word does sound way too fancy for the 15,000 words I have so far) for nanowrimo!!!! No way I could do fiction!

  16. I was thinking about doing this, and lord knows I have the time, but I have never successfully written fiction either, and I'm intimidated. Oh well. Maybe November can be National Novel Brainstorming Month.

  17. I did nano last year. I made it to fifty thousand on the last day. Though the last five were purely my reviews on movies that I somehow manage to fit into the plot. Oh, and I haven't touched the document since nano ended.

  18. Hell! I'm working on getting a haiku finished by the end of the month!

  19. And it's a run-on sentence at that...just kidding!~

  20. I'm in my fourth (I think) year of NaNo. I've only "won" once before, two years ago, and I did it cheating (writing a memoir). This writing fiction thing is not being as easy as I'd hoped. I had a really great story in mind that I had thought of a couple years ago, and I'm happy with the progress, it's just been SO hard to sit down and DO it.

    Not doing quite as bad as you, I'm only about 3 days behind at 11,000 words :) I believe in you, though!

  21. @Joe Ambrosino, haikus are pretty much tough for me so goodluck! By the way Im a literary fan but i suck at writing one..haha

  22. Anonymous2:01 PM

    I agree! I think some unemployed person with a new type writer must have come up with this. I think I'll stick with No Shave November. Since I'm already on a roll with that. :)


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