I was going to make this a TGI...WTF post but got distracted by my sister's amazing analysis of Eeyore's psychiatric profile ("Poor Eeyore. His friends are such dicks." Hahahahaha. And also, true.)
Anyway, I was at my mom's a few weeks ago and for some reason she whipped out my 20 year-old immunization card. I'm about to experience a slight gap in health coverage, so I can only assume she wanted me to have it as sort of a protective talisman. See, God? I got my measles, mumps, and rubella vaccine! And two tine tests! I'm a good person, please don't run me over by a truck just because COBRA is fucking expensive as shit!
Anyway, take a look at this and tell me... what is wrong with this picture?
"This information is needed when your child enters school..."
"... to confuse teachers as to which bathroom Una needs to use."
I'd shrug this off as a clerical error, but let's not forget that my Phi Beta Kappa letters are addressed to Mister, and that I was the only "girl" in my kindergarten class to dress as Peter Pan for Halloween.
Mother, is there something I should know?