Simply put, the background image of my blog is the best drawing I have ever done, and proof that I have been a sassy curmudgeon for a long, long time. Behold:
Click to enlarge. You will not be sorry.
Backstory:
The year: 1985. I was drawing on the floor of my Dad's office in Texas. I heard him say "Fuck!" to someone on the phone. I asked him how to spell it and he did (Awesome Parenting 101). This drawing hangs prominently in our apartment. I find that no matter what kind of day I've had, it makes me feel better. Either it's "Fuck! Life fucking sucks sometimes," or "Fuck! What a fan-fucking-tastic fucking day!"
Fuck! I'm glad I shared this with you. Sharing is caring.
1. LOVE that you are cranking out the blog entries lately--seeing that there is a new one does for me what your drawing does for you.
ReplyDelete2. cannot believe that i never noticed the word balloon in that drawing... not only is it the best drawing you've ever done (as dubbed by you), but surely it is the best drawing done by any five-year-old ever.
It's certainly the best art I've ever seen!!!
ReplyDeleteLOL, that's the best! My grandmother never gets tired of telling me how much trouble she got into because I learned how to say "shit" from her. She said it in response to hearing that my aunt got into a car accident.
ReplyDeleteMy aunt was fine, but I subsequently went home and rammed my toy cars together, yelling "Oh shit! Oh shit!" My mother was not amused.
That rocks. I would SO keep my kid's drawings longer if they had F-bombs in them.
ReplyDeleteMy 2 year old said "damn" today when he missed a basket with a block he was trying to throw in. I didn't correct him, but I'm thinking I should maybe stop cussing around him so much...
ReplyDeleteAmazing drawing skillz for a 6 year-old, btw.
I have to say that is the best explaination I have ever heard. And I think it's absolutely brilliant that this picture is hanging in your apartment. That's fan-freaking-tastic!
ReplyDeletethanks for that. refreshing to ask a question and get an answer; an awesome, awesome answer.
ReplyDeletenormally it goes something like:
dear nabisco: whats up with the tiny vending machine oreos?
dear sincerely yours: they're the same size as regular oreos
dear nabisco: no they're not, here are some photos to prove it.
dear sincerely yours: ...
I love your father's honesty, and I love the drawing! Shame on parents who don't encourage proper spelling skills. :)
ReplyDeleteKeep up the great posts!
you make me want to be a better blogger.
ReplyDeletealso, your picture is what attracted me to you. it was love at first sighting of your background.
While in the car without me, my 3 year old daughter asked her mother, "where are the dumb bastards today mommy?"
ReplyDeleteMy wife replied, "they are only around when your father is driving!"
My favorite use of the word "fuck" is "Fuck you, you fucking fucks". It pretty much covers everything.
ReplyDelete(My blog is private now, by the way. If you'd like to be a reader, you can email me at brentsgirl2008@gmail.com!)
I thought your background was a small bag of fast-food fries--or maybe a recycled bag filled with bananas (yes, I'm a conflicted soul). I get the f-bomb (nice :D), but what is the square head with spiky banana/french-fry hair?
ReplyDeleteThis kinda reminds me of the time I posted a dream (because I thought it was JUST funny) and was thoroughly and publicly (anonymously) analyzed.
that made my day!
ReplyDeleteHAHA! I had been wondering what your background image was also! I love it! Great piece of work!
ReplyDeleteMove the F over, Mona Lisa, I will take this over Da Vinci any day !
ReplyDeleteJust want to say, that having discovered your blog earlier this week, and then promptly having had some of the shittest days of my life so far, your blog has really helped me smile! Fuck! Good work! I've also forwarded the most amusing to my Mum, who works with terminally ill people, so she also is in need of a laugh most days. Keep it up SC!
ReplyDeleteI'm new to this whole blogging thing. But this entry of yours just made me giggle!
ReplyDeleteI was wondering what was in that speech bubble. The answer is better than I'd hoped!
ReplyDeleteThis drawing reminds me of my own childhood scribblings including a few choice words of my own. Back then, I had a habit of drawing all over pages of books. I guess we're both products of 80's parenting!
ReplyDeleteI commend you for not only brandishing this nostalgic masterpiece, but also for having held onto to it since 1985.
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad I'm not the only one who relishes in the good ol' days of drawing people with no necks. ^.^
Your blog = juicy awesomeness
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ReplyDeleteI love it!
ReplyDeleteMy sister and I spotted "fuck" very elegantly spray painted on a sidewalk one day. My father very matter of factly explained it was just another word for fire. Amazingly, we never felt the need to use this newly discovered vocabulary word instead of fire. Particularly considering he was very involved in our community's police/fire administration and had to go to fire scenes to ensure roadways etc. were planned well enough for a fire truck to get through. I'm surprised I never told the story of how I met the "Fuck Chief" to my fellow first graders.
ReplyDeleteP.S. This made my day.
ReplyDeleteshould be hung in the LOLgallery :) hehe i love it
ReplyDeleteThat is so fucking precious it should be framed in pure gold and prominently displayed at MOMA! (with backstory of course)
ReplyDeleteI guess you came from a fully functioning background-LOL
ReplyDeleteThats funny, sounds like something my dad would do. I have a couple boxes I keep with all my old school stuff in the top shelf of my closet. The art; not as good as this one, of course lol.
ReplyDeleteThat's the kind of parenting that makes people like you as awesome as they are today.
ReplyDeleteExcellent art as well. You ought to sell prints to use as motivation posters in business environments!
Hey there, Sassy Curmudgeon! Just discovered your blog today (well, more like had it thrust upon me by the 'Blogs of Note' tab I accidentally clicked, but still) and ended up laughing so hard I spewed Odwalla all over my desk (it was the gay 'N Syncer or Fat 'N Syncer quip that did it, if you want to know specifics). The F--- drawing and Rainbow Brite-meets-Animal pics were fairly spew-inducing as well. Others have been known to find my writing amusing, but when I encounter the hilarity levels present in your writing it makes me hang my head and admit that any witticisms to emerge from my pen were blatantly stolen from old episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000, and that I am in fact a humorless crone. Keep up the wry commentary and thanks for the laughs!
ReplyDeleteI've always thought that it was a happy pineapple. I never noticed the speech balloon before, but it definitely increases the coolness by about 85%. :)
ReplyDeleteThis made my whole day! Thanks - Kelly
ReplyDeleteLove it!
ReplyDeleteWe had a sign made up for over our fruit bowl saying "no pumpkins". Miss 4 was asked one day if she wanted watermelon for dessert, and answered "yes please. No pumpkin, just watermelon" The shopping had only been done that day and the pumpkin and watermelon were on the bench next to each other.
My mum never swears. EVER. (so not where I get my sailor's wife vocab from) When she gets pissed off, she says "sugar" instead of swearing, and tried to teach my son to do the same (instead of swear like a trouper like his mumma). Now he yells "sugar off" whenever he is mad. And i love it!
The year: 1985. I was playing with the neighborhood kids and the discussion came up as to what the 'f' word actually was. According to my mother, after some time had passed, I got flustered and announced to the others, "well, I know it isn't fart!"
ReplyDeleteAnd all this time I thought the background drawing was a kid's attempt at a bag of fries.
ReplyDelete"You want fries with your blog?"