2. A small pillow wrapped in a big gold bow, which looks like something a gay midget might sleep with but is actually meant to hold your wedding bands;
3. An aisle runner (just in case it rains and you have to get married indoors, and if it doesn't rain you are stuck with a fucking 50 foot burgundy runner which, just to tell yourself you got your money's worth, you will have to use to stage pretend red carpet events in your living room);
4. Blue underpants bedazzled with rhinestones spelling out "Mrs. Poo Pants"
Yeah, I was debating whether to post that last one. The explanation is even worse than you might imagine -- it doesn't have to do with poop, but it does have to do with Ronald Reagan.
Hey, I purchased the blue rhinestone-bedazzled underpants that said "Mrs. Mobettagrady". We all go thru it for some reason ;)
ReplyDeleteyou didnt, did you? that's really funny and awesome.
ReplyDeletei can't wait to see this crazy stuff (well, maybe not the bedazzlers). heck, you can always let the red carpet line your staircase later.