Last night, I got a text from Jeff. It said, simply, "Dui for lo-lo".
Jeff's texts usually read "I love u" or "Poop" (he comes from a scatalogical family, in which 'poop' is an all-purpose word, and can even be used, in some cases, as a greeting). Jeff is a pretty easy-to-read kind of guy. His messages don't usually need to be decoded.
I, of course, think too much about everything, so I immediately formed some theories:
1. This is a private joke that I cannot possibly remember, maybe because I was high
2. Jeff has a mistress, and he meant to send this to her, and "Dui for lo-lo" is their secret affair code
3. Jeff has gone insane
I called Jeff. "Hey," I said. "I have no earthly idea what your text means."
"DUI," he said, "Lindsay Lohan got arrested for a DUI. I thought you'd want to know."
Oh, Jeff. I've ruined you! But I love you forever!