Friday, March 2, 2007

Clap If You Believe in Unas

I made a run-of-the-mill phone call today about an invoice that proved very informative. A brief transcript:


Guy: Hi, this is Scott.

Me: Hi, my name is Una. I'm calling from BlackBook and we have an invoice --

Scott: Great name.

Me: Thanks.

Scott: Did you ever -- I bet you get this all the time --

My brain: Please don't say Uma Thurman.

Scott: There's this movie called Legend, with Tom Cruise, from the 80s. It wasn't out on DVD until recently, but Tom Cruise was like a magical wood nymph --

Me: Tom Cruise was a wood nymph?

Scott: Yeah, it's a great movie, and there's this character named Oona in it. She's like a Tinkerbell-type fairy.

Me: Wow. Well, I'm calling to see if we can pay this invoice by credit card.

Scott: We don't actually have a credit card system here.

Me: Oh, OK. Thanks.

Scott: Watch Legend!



So I Google "Una Legend" and of course nothing comes up because every character named Una is spelled with the double-O (perhaps they foresaw the tendency of people to pronounce the U version 'You-na').



So I google "Oona Legend", and behold, a site devoted to her:

There are no words for this promotional photo -- if you have a caption email me.



Not much is known about Oona, except that she is a cheeky willful little forest fairy and lives in a magical forest together with other mythological creatures like elves and goblins. None of her friends have seen her true self before because she kept it a secret since she was born. Oona has wild unbrushed golden hair, unusual lightblue eyes and wears a very revealing dress probably made of leaves and others natural materials. She acts bitchy and stubborn sometimes, but she has a heart of gold and a very carefree spirit.



They only got a few things wrong:



Not much is known about Oona Una, except that she is a cheeky willful little forest fairy magazine writer and lives in a magical forest brownstone together with other mythological creatures like elves Jeff and goblins mice. None of her friends have seen her true self before because she kept it a secret since she was born had a unibrow. Oona Una has wild unbrushed golden brunette hair, unusual lightblue hazel eyes and wears a very revealing dress probably made of leaves rayon and others natural materials. She acts bitchy and stubborn sometimes, but she has a heart of gold and a very carefree spirit.



Anyone out there seen Legend? I want to know if this Oona person really is my fairy doppelganger.
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7 comments :

  1. Anonymous11:03 PM

    ahahaha! that way better than if you google Zoe. press google images: 8000 photos of small dogs. screw everyone who names their dog Zoe. funny that you have a fairy tatoo on your shoulder..hmm.

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  2. Chessa12:19 PM

    How have you never seen Legend?!?! Tim Curry is a giant red devil creature w/ oversized horns, and the chick from Ferris Bueller is the damsel in distress. And Tom Cruise is still a young gymnast. Worthy of a rainy-day Netflix w/ popcorn :)

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  3. Una, I love Legend, it was one of the first-ever movies I made out to (with a girl, of course).

    By the way, I just got my copy of BlackBook. Thanks!

    You know, I am rather impressed with the magazine's style. Even thoguyh I question the value of a a cover story on Pamela Anderson (how many magazine covers has the woman seen?), I love all the photos, the layout is snazzy, and it generally evokes cool, urban hipness.

    Basically, BlackBook is my new leave-it-around the apartment status builder. Move over, stodgy New Yorker!

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  4. for a caption, how about "stop trying right now, jeff zorabedian: the most awesome photograph ever to be taken by a human being already exists"

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  5. OOna is one of my all time favorite film characters. I'm sure shes just like you.

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  6. actually it IS Oona...if you watch with closed captioned or subtitled....that's how her name comes up.

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  7. Hey there. I was doing an imdb search to see what that actor has done since and I came across your site. Oona was a sweet character. She was super in love with Tom Cruise and could change shape and he was all like "No way. Give the distant, innocent, slightly ditzy human." and I was in the audience (at age eleven or whenever this came out) going "What? Are you an idiot?" If she is indeed your doppleganger, you're in luck. I recommend the film. One of Ridley Scott's earlier films. It's all about the atmosphere. Visually, it's still pretty stunning considering they'd probably do half of the effects with a computer these days. Check it out. It won't blow your mind but it's pretty cool.

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