Friday, July 28, 2006

Forget Team Aniston and Team Jolie. I'm Team Nehru!

I have become fairly obsessed with the My Heritage Celebrity Face Recognition program. Of course, the first thing it's good for is finding out who you look like, which, in my case, was a wake-up call. Then, if you don't feel like the first time was correct (COUGH *Eddie Murphy* COUGH), you run the program a few more thousand times until you get Grace Kelly or Rachel Weisz.

Today I had an amazing epiphany: Hollywood should totally use My Heritage for casting biopics!

Capote was a great movie, but after a quick upload, it became clear that Philip Seymour Hoffman was wrong for the role. My Heritage offers up a thrilling trifecta of top actors who resemble Truman Capote: Hugo Weaving (61% compatibility), Jeff Bridges (53%) and Antonio Banderas (52%). My personal favorite, Natalie Portman (50%), came in a close fourth, right before Jason Alexander (48%).

Stick Harper Lee's mug in there, and it gets even better. George Peppard wins this race (61%), followed by Adam Sandler (60%). The sole woman on the list (sorry, Harper) is neither Catherine Keener nor Sandra Bullock, but Holly Hunter. You know she would've nailed it, too.

More recently, there's been some hubub surrounding Brad Pitt's production of "A Mighty Heart", based on the book by Marianne Pearl. Jennifer Aniston was interested in the role, but, lo and behold, it's gone to Angelina Jolie. How about someone who hasn't slept with Mr. Pitt? My Heritage favors Robin Wright Penn, Shannon Elizabeth, and Ingrid Bergmann. Also in the running? Jawaharlal Nehru. Now that's some inspired casting.

I think this site is just the thing to get Hollywood back on top of its game. I mean, yeah, Capote was critically lauded, but can you imagine the crowds that would have shown up for Adam Sandler? Can't you just die thinking about Natalie Portman as an elfin, gamine Capote acting all bitchy towards George Peppard in a fright wig?

Oh, and I REALLY hope I get famous now, because the idea of a romantic comedy starring Eddie Murphy and Viggo Mortensen (my boyfriend, Jeff's, top match) is just too precious for words.


  1. so i try a picture and come up with:
    isabella rossellini (ok ...), beyonce (score), penelope cruz (because i'm from ehspain too), madonna (i'm so buff, no wonder), alyssa milano (love who's the boss! another compliment), lisa kudrow (please, no), and many other women that i am constantly getting confused for on the streets of davis, ca.

  2. I entered the photo of us dancing together, and it told me that I'm 60% John Updike, and 55% Elle Macpherson. I'm unsure as how to feel about this.


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